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20 Things Dressage Riders Never Say

  1. I wish my seat wasn't this good.
  2. These breeches make me look skinny.
  3. I wish my boobs were bigger.
  4. I'm so excited to show my young 3-year old at its first show tomorrow.
  5. My dressage saddle fits perfectly.
  6. I wish my horse would stop trotting like Valegro.
  7. I wish my legs were shorter.
  8. This dressage show is so cheap.
  9. I wish my calves were 3 times the size they are now.
  10. My arms are too long.
  11. My horse is too on the aids.
  12. My horses trot is too smooth.
  13. Meh, I wish my horses didn't keep getting these 10's.
  14. I'm surprised my vet doesn't charge way more.
  15. My horses tail is way too thick.
  16. I have enough saddle pads.
  17. I'd never let Carl Hester sit on my horse.
  18. I have no lower back pain.
  19. These bucking horses I keep getting in for training are so fun.
  20. I have so much money left after board and training fees I don't know what to do with it all.
  21. BONUS - My legs are so tanned.
  22. BONUS - I love schooling in shorts. 


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  • I know one crazy girl who would agree with no. 4.

    Marilyn Storch on

  • Absolutely perfict! Couldn’t have hit it anymore spot on ! Ahhhhhahhhh lol

    Cecelia Duncan on

  • Too funny. I love it!

    Gale on

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