Contact, oh contact, what does it mean?
Trying to figure this out makes me want to scream
Too light, too soft, too hard, too strong
My instructor yells that it's always wrong
They say it means whats going on in the back
This Dressage thing I can't seem to get the knack
"The hindelgs the hindlegs they are too out behind!"
Trying to get this horse straight has got me in a bind
I kick and sit and close and I pray
There has got to be a much easier way
I'm drenched in sweat and haven't left the walk
I felt it, I felt it! I engaged his hock!!
Tears of joy stream from my face
Until my instructor puts me back in my place
His back is round and he's finally coming through
Oh wait, never mind he's just taking a poo
We are trotting now and this is much better
The contact is perfect and he's a light as a feather
It's not so hard, dressage has become clear
Until I trot by and look in the mirror
My horse is as long as a two storey train
Why do a sport that drives me insane?
I bend I flex I click and I cluck
My horse decides that's the cue for buck.
We fly through the air in a moment's flash
I swear I felt something leak from my ass.
I ride it out and act like I'm fine
I think the universe just sent me a sign
I reposition: legs, seat, check!
A little squeeze and he starts to collect!
He picks up the cadence and starts to prance
Me and my horse are doing a dance!
The bills, the pain, the horror all fade
I pet my horse for a ride well played.
I walk back to the barn with a grin far and wide
I can't wait for tomorrow I'm gonna learn how to ride!